Family Guy – Brian Goes to Obedience School
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Peter: Hey Lois, can you pour my juice? I can't lift my arm.
Lois: I still can't believe Brian bit you. It just doesn't seem like him.
Stewie: Oh yeah, because you know him so well. Shut your faaace.
Peter: Oh, heh. Hey Brian!
Brian: Get outta' that chair. Leave the eggs.
Peter: But, this is my breakfast.
Peter: Morning, sir.
Brian: So, Peter. I assume if you're watching TV, that means you already did all of my chores?
Peter: I sure did, sure did. I scared off the mailman, threatened Quagmire's cat, and I even took your bath for you.
Chris: I'm just gonna reach for the shampoo. No jumping out.
*Peter jumps out of the bathtub*
Stewie: Ahh! He's got Rupert! Hey, Drop it, Drop it, Drop it.
Brian: All right, I need you to buy a birthday present for my friend, Jeff.
Brian: He likes the Packers and surfing.
Lois: Enough is enough, Peter. The dog's not in charge of this house.
Lois: First thing tomorrow, I'm taking Brian to obedience school; so we can get him back under control.
Stewie: You know sending him to school wouldn't be the worst idea. He might even enjoy it. I know I had a blast in college.
Random Guy: Man I love college. So many chicks, and so many parties!
Stewie: Yeah! Heheh, Totally.
Stewie: I'm supposed to meet the R.A for coffee later in the common room,
but until then, I'm just gonna walk around with my shower caddy and see what people wrote on their whiteboards.
Listen up maggots! You're in my house now! There are no belly scratches here,
there are no table scraps! What we have here are good dogs! No bandana wearing, Frisbee catching, hippie dogs.
No parking lot, hind-leg dancing, YouTube dogs. No crime solving, camera mugging, Scooby Dooby dog!
Oh, no Scooby Doo, huh? Ruh roh.
Oh, it seems we got ourselves a comedy dog.
Are you Kathy Griffin, cause I ain't laughing.
So maybe you are Kathy Griffin or maybe you're that comedy dog with Roberts Michael's hand up your backside.
Let me tell you something comedy dog,
you're here for ME to poop on.
All right first of all it seems like you have a lot of opinions about a lot of
comedians and second of all–
That hurts that's right, silent and terrible. Like the artist. I watch a lot of TV and movies.
I am your media Savvy worst nightmare! Now down on all fours like the rest of them. That's right,
We got ways to break your spirit in fact you seem like a brand candidate for the chair
*retarded ass music before brian gets a pistol up his asshole*
Honey, did you hear a dog scream? Yes I did dear. Our summer cabin is near the obedience school.
''Brian rings bell*
Hey, Brian! You're back! Come on in.
Are you sure yeah? What do you think? I'm Gonna make you stay in a yard get in here?
Sir, if it takes the rest of my life, I will repay you will who is this puss oh no no, no. I'm not a cat
I'm I'm a dog. I'm your pet and and I'm just happy to be here Brian
What did they do to you with that school yes?
Looks like someone's going at him with a whip that is that is a perfectly valid way of saying that bravo Master Master
And a surprisingly quick erection for Stewie
* welp its offical stewie fucks dogs*
There you go, you look very dapper, sir. Thanks Brian. God
I love the new you that obedience school really schooled you in obedience, huh!
That's why it's called that permission to take fast tiny bites of my own tail sir granted
You wearing a bow tie what's the occasion? No occasion Lois. I just want to piss a couple of guys off
What the hell are you doing you think you're better than us? No way you tied that on your own
(Drunk) Hey, brain, you know what we should do?let's you and me go pee in meg's bed. That's always fun
pee in her bed…?
I Could never do that!
That would be peeing in the house, and that's that's bad dog stuff. That's not good dog stuff Peter: Wait what? what are you talking about?
Oh forgive me for speaking out of turn sir, but you sent me to that school to change me
It was your turn when it first I went and you went we best get you to bed sir. Come on, Brian
It's still early. Let's just go throw potatoes at Cleveland's house you go ahead
I've got to go make the waffle fries that you scream requested in the car
Jeez what the hell happend to him. I am we used to be so close, but now we seem so different like a whale and his
developmentally disabled brother
get in my mouth you hundreds of fish
come in my mouth hundreds of fish!