In my life, I’ve received some really good and some really bad pussy fingering sessions. It seems that some men are masters at fingering a pussy and others are …
In my life, I've received some exquisite 
fingering sessions from my lovers…¬†¬†
and some really, really bad ones. So today 
I'm bringing to you all of that wisdom,  
experience and insight in my comprehensive guide 
to fingering a woman. My name is Helena Nista and  
I am a sex therapist and a Tantra practitioner. I 
make videos about great sex, legendary pleasure,  
about Tantra and passionate relationships. So make 
sure to subscribe to my channel and also hit the  
'Bell' icon to get access to all of my new tools, 
tips and advice. There are absolutely amazing  
things you can do to a woman's genital area using 
your hands and fingers skilfully: you can excite  
her, you can tease her, you can arouse her, 
you can bring her to blissful states of ecstasy  
and to powerful orgasms. When used well, your 
hands can play her pussy like an instrument,  
taking her up and down to different levels of 
pleasure and arousal. Your fingers can guide her  
towards a land of promises of delights to come and 
then you can keep her there, right at the edge of  
that place, without quite taking her there. When 
done well, this will drive her mad with desire and  
make her beg you for more. But for most men the 
vulva (meaning the external part of the female  
genitalia) is a mysterious place and they don't 
have a map or any kind of guidance to navigate  
that area well. So let's first take a look at the 
different parts of the vulva. When you first look  
between woman's legs, you will see her outer 
lips. They might be covered with hair if she  
hasn't shaven the hair off or if she hasn't waxed 
it off. When she opens her legs or when you part  
her outer lips, you will see her inner lips. And 
here they are quite chunky and thick because it's  
just a cushion. But on an actual woman, the inner 
lips are quite thin, wrinkly and quite moist.  
Where the inner lips meet at the top, this is 
where you'll find the clitoris. The clitoris is  
a very special part of a female genital anatomy 
because it's extremely sensitive. Because of  
that sensitivity, the clitoris is covered 
with a piece of skin called 'clitoral hood'.  
Between the inner lips, you will also find the 
opening to her vagina. All of these parts of  
female genital anatomy are very sensitive and 
very receptive to pleasure. So keep that in mind  
when you're fingering her. It's not just all 
about the clit! There is much more you can do  
when massaging her pussy. So first of 
all, be very clear on your intention here.  
Don't finger her pussy from any sort of a place 
of neediness or your own horniness. Don't do it  
with an agenda of getting her to repay the favour 
afterwards. She will feel your energy and it will  
make her feel like she can't fully receive your 
touch. So instead, give from a place of generosity  
and love. Let go of any agenda and simply 
finger her for the sake of giving her pleasure.  
Ask her to lie down comfortably and start by 
gently stroking her entire body. This doesn't  
need to take a lot of time but will be helpful 
in creating a much more pleasurable experience  
for her. And every time you touch and stroke her 
skin, imagine that you're making love to her body  
using your hands and fingers. When you're ready to 
start touching her pussy, play with the following  
external strokes. And absolutely make sure to 
use an organic, quality lubricant here. Her  
lady parts will not respond well to a dry hand! My 
personal favourite is coconut oil but make sure to  
ask her about her preference. Holding her pussy 
with a still hand is really exquisite so take  
your time here and make sure to pour all of your 
love through your hand. Gentle vibration can feel  
really amazing and you can introduce little 
pauses here where you vibrate… and then hold¬†¬†
still. And vibrate, and hold still, etc. Circular 
massage doesn't involve any friction so simply  
hold your hand on her vulva and then massage in 
circles while moving all the parts of her genital  
anatomy with your hand. Take your time and knead 
the outer lips. Make sure to check in with her  
about the pressure of your touch here. Once you're 
done with one of them, move on to the other one.  
Tepeat the kneading on the inner lips. There's 
no rush here so really make sure to be slow,  
to take your time and to make sure to take 
care of both of the of the lips. If they're  
really small and you can't quite take 
a hold of each one of them separately,  
you can just knead and massage them together. 
Using your three middle fingers, place one between  
the inner lips and the other two between each 
inner and outer lip. And next, very very slowly,  
very gently and using a lot of lubrication, 
start stroking her all the way up to above the  
clitoris and then slowly all the way down to 
her perineum (the perineum is located between  
her vagina and her anus). You can spend quite a 
lot of time here and when done correctly, this  
stroke is actually capable of placing her 
in altered states of ecstatic consciousness.  
Next, place one finger between her inner and 
outer lip and start gently stroking that groove,  
tracing that groove all the way up to above 
her clitoris and then all the way down on  
the other side. So you're sort of making 
a loop, hence the name 'Tour de France'.  
This is a very teasing stroke because here 
you're gently stroking her clit without  
over-stimulating it at this stage. Take your time 
and make sure to go around quite a few times.  
Because of how sensitive the clitoris is, it can 
be fun to actually stroke it indirectly first,  
before you stroke it directly. So what you 
can do is: you can actually place the clitoris  
between her outer lips and then gently massage 
it with your fingers through the outer lips.  
At this stage she should be quite aroused and 
ready for a more direct clitoral stimulation.  
So that's when you can apply the 'Clit Clock' 
which is a lot of fun. Clit Clock works in a  
way that you imagine that her clitoris is like 
the face of the clock, with all the o'clocks  
being located around on the edges. So what 
you're going to do is you're going to very gently  
massage each o'clock just with tiny little 
circles, going around the edge of the clitoris,  
working your way around her clit until you 
get back to the top. You can also just for  
the fun of it tell her which o'clock you're 
massaging and then after that ask her which  
o'clock was her favourite. Make sure to 
be really slow with all of these strokes  
and with some of them you can use some variety 
in terms of pressure, speed and location of your  
fingers. Use your judgment here, keep asking for 
her feedback and also watch her body's response.  
When she's relaxed, breathing deeply and lost in 
her pleasure, you are on the right track. When  
you've taken a good care of her external bits, you 
can go inside. The entrance to her vagina is rich  
in nerve endings so massaging it gently is going 
to give her a lot of pleasure. And it's also going  
to really arouse her because you're creating an 
anticipation that you're going to go inside soon,  
but you're not quite there yet. Once you decide to 
go inside, don't go all the way in. Insert maybe  
first two knuckles of your finger or two fingers 
inside and explore her g-spot area. You will find  
it by pressing up towards her belly and 
feeling the area. It should feel like the  
roof of your mouth with the sort of ridges 
you'll find there. So feel for this area,  
massage it because this is a place of beautiful 
sensuality and sensitivity for many women. Also  
remember here that the first outer third of the 
vagina is most sensitive. That's where the most  
nerve endings is located internally. So spend 
some time really exploring here, massaging,  
pushing into different areas, to really 
explore her full pleasure potential here.  
Only once you've spent some time here, go deeper 
and explore the deeper parts of her vagina,  
including her cervix (which is the entrance to the 
womb). And again here just explore, be curious,  
keep noticing her body's responses, 
try playing with different speeds,  
with different pressures, pressing in or just 
massaging, moving in and out, moving around,  
asking her what works well for her and also just 
watching her body: is she relaxed, is she moaning,  
is she in pleasure or is she tense. Be curious, 
find out what really works for her. Towards  
the end of your pussy massage make sure to 
also combine the internal strokes with the  
external ones. Particularly the g-spot 
and the clitoris work well together.  
All of these strokes will give her a heightened 
experience of pleasure and erotic activation.  
So it really is a powerful thing to give your 
woman a great fingering session. But one last  
bit of important advice from me is to make sure 
that you are enjoying yourself. If you're bored or  
resentful that you have to do something for her, 
or if your heart just isn't in it, she will feel  
it and it will reduce her own enjoyment of your 
touch. So learn to enjoy this process! Remember  
that touch is always two-directional, meaning that 
when you're stroking her, you're also experiencing  
her skin on your hands and fingers. This can 
be very arousing, fun and delightful for you.  
I hope that this guide helps you and allows you to 
give plenty of amazing, mind-blowingly pleasurable  
pussy-fingering sessions to your lover. If you 
enjoyed this video, please give it a 'Thumbs-up'!  
And leave me a comment below with your favourite 
pussy stroke Рas a man, as a giver or as a woman,  
as a receiver of such strokes. I love receiving 
your posts and always respond to them personally.  
Thank you so much for watching and I look 
forward to seeing you in my next video!

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