Squirrely Dan's Relationship
It’s impolite to kiss and tell. Now streaming on Crave and Hulu. …
You're huckin' the ball around with your pals
the other day.
Say, uh, whats the deal with your sweetie there,
I took her out last night.
Outs to the chip truck.
Fries and gravy?
I had mine with gravy.
She had hers with salts and malts vinegar.
Y'know that salt and malt vinegar is not a
traditional way to dress your french fries
in the United States?
The fuck is wrong with them?
Like malt vinegar is not a staple condiment
on table tops in restaurants
in the United States.
Fuck, figure it out.
S'what I say, I said figure it out.
Yeah. No vinegars on the tables,
no Krafts peanut butters.
Figure it out.
-Fuckin' figure it out.
Better not forget those fuckin'
all dressed chips.
No ketchup chips neither.
Figure it out.
Somebody really oughta write a letter.
They do got six different types of Cap'n Crunch
How do you know that?
Saw a comedian talks about it on the Just
for Rears can't remember his name though.
Good guy though?
Little long-winded for my taste but yeah,
pretty good guy.
Well glad to hear he's a good guy at least.
They have running water down there?
The evening went so well that uh we gots to
a little bits of the foolin arounds.
Did you french her?
Kinda outta line there, Dary.
Did you go up her shirt?
Now you're really outta line, Dary.
We did french, that much I will reveal.
Well you're willing to reveal that much you
might as well just tell us if you went up her shirt.
It's impolite to kiss and tell, Dary.
I don't like to kiss and tell, but,
the frenchin's tooks a hard left turn
from which I have yets to recover.
I'm not asking you to kiss
and tell, that's impolite, but,
I'm kinda curious.
Yeah, Dan, kiss and tell.
Well I'm sure you boys have had a couple curve
balls thrown your ways betwixt the sheets.
Well, not to be impolite but you know sometimes
a gal will be kissin' around on like the area
near your genitals but not quite on your genitals?
Makes me ticklish and insecure.
You know not to be impolite, but, sometimes
a gal will do some kissin' on the ears which
makes me uncomfortable because even though
I clean my ears sometimes a tater'll just
roll out of there unexpected.
I kinda likes both those things.
That's why you're called Squirrely Dan.
Yeah, reason fuckin' five million.
Well, nots to be impolite but, this gal suggested
that maybe I should have some attentions paid
to my buttshole.
That ever happen to you guys?
You ever have a gal suggest that you need
some attentions paid
to your buttsholes?
I'll takes that as a hard no, I guess.
She put a couple fingers up there and turns
out you got an erogenous zone up there, found
the hot button and gaves it a tickle and uh
It feels pretty good you guys ok.
-I really liked it.
Felt-felt very natural.
That's how you get the body in front of it.
They call it milking the prostate.
Well it's impolite to kiss and tell.