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Hello, Ms. Archana.
– Hello.
Congratulate me.
I opened a departmental store.
Congratulations.
Smile, Ms. Titli.
You are in
'Bachcha Departmental Store'.
Mr. Bachcha, you should worry.
Because Titli is angry.
Why are you angry?
I told you that we have to go
to meet my grand mother's
sister-in law's uncle's
son's brother's
younger sister's..
What are you saying?
I'm saying
my grand mother's
sister-in law's uncle's
grandson's younger sister's
son's brother's nephew's
grandmother' grandson's
younger brother's
tonsure ceremony is there.
Tonsure ceremony.
You should say that we have
to go for the tonsure ceremony.
What should I do?
I just started this shop.
I can't leave it unattended.
Fine. Don't leave it.
Pack it up.
We will take it with us.
Great. We will take
a doctor with us too.
Will the doctor help
with tonsure?
No. He treats people like you.
I'm asking you politely.
Will you close your shop
or should I show you my punch?
Of course, we will go.
I have called a salesman.
Let me tell him about
the work then we can go.
Fine. Meanwhile, pack the gift.
Gift for whom?
I told you
my grand mother's
sister-in law's uncle's
grandson's younger sister's
son's brother's nephew's
younger brother's
tonsure ceremony is there.
Okay. I'll do it. Forgive me.
I'll see you soon. You may go.
What nonsense.
Look at my departmental store,
Ms. Archana.
Everything is available here.
– Wow.
From digestive pills
to ladies' blouse
everything is available here.
Are you a salesman?
No, I'm spider-man.
I just forgot to wear
my underwear out.
Let me tell you something.
I forgot to wear it at all.
But I never showed pride.
Is today Diwali?
– No.
Why is it so bright?
You are wearing glasses?
I know that but why
are you looking so bright?
Don't make other's jealous
all the time.
I want a guy for my shop.
There was a time
when one used to search
for a guy for their daughter.
Yes.
– Now a guy for the shop.
Fine. I accept this proposal.
I'll accept your shop
without dowry.
Very good.
Do you hear what you say?
If you hear do you understand
what you say?
What if I ask you
if you are able to digest
what you eat?
If you do then
why are you gaining weight?
If you want to work
as a salesman here
then I'll take your interview.
Why? I'm not a movie star.
I do want to work in a movie
but the problem is
that I can't wear a bikini.
Why?
Girls wear bikinis.
Bikini doesn't know
who is wearing it.
Can you guess that
I'm wearing it inside?
Bikini is worn outside.
Should I wear it outside?
Men don't wear bikinis.
Then you will say
that men don't wear bangles.
Yes, they don't.
Then you will say that
men don't apply nail paints.
Yes, they don't.
Then give me
nail paint remover
I'll come after applying them.
I had no idea.
This is a departmental store
not a restaurant cum bar.
Did you get it?
Now if you want to
get a job here then tell me
if you have any experience
of selling anything.
I have a lot of experience.
You won't believe me.
I sold my dad.
Oh, God.
Why did you sell your dad?
My mother was not able
to sell him.
So, I sold him.
I took two young uncles
by selling one dad.
Now we play a game
of uncle and nephew.
It's great fun.
Did you sell anything else?
Who do you think sold you all
to Sony channel?
No one cared about you.
I sold you at that time.
What do you think?
If you want to work
as a salesman in my shop
you will have to open my shop
in the morning 9 o'clock.
I can't come at 9 a.m.
Why?
– I set my alarm at 11 a.m.
Set it for 9 a.m.
What will I do
with the 11 a.m. alarm?
Switch the 11 a.m. alarm off.
You want me to switch if off.
You want to switch my alarm off
to open your shop.
Are you a racist?
Let's make a compromise.
I'll come at three.
Who comes at
three o'clock for a job?
You earn in lakhs
while coming at 9:30 p.m.
Did I object then?
If I want to come
at three o'clock
then you have a problem.
If you work properly
I'll give you salary on time
and will give you
Diwali bonus too.
Not on Diwali,
I want on every Sunday.
Sunday will be a holiday.
I'll take holiday on Monday.
Why on Monday?
Because Sunday is already
a holiday.
Whatever you want to speak,
speak at this.
Listen.
I've to go out with my wife.
I'm giving the responsibility
of my shop to you.
I'll ask for details later.
Take care of the shop.
Got it?
Ms. Archana, I got the job.
Many congratulations to me.
Whether you congratulate me
or not
return me the six rupees you
took from me in my childhood.
She is so smart. She came to me
when I was having an ice cream
and said, 'I came from ice cream
testing department.'
Let me lick it.
The six rupees are worth
50 lakhs now.
Really?
When you didn't give me
six rupees,
then it's impossible to get
50 lakhs from you.
Do one thing.
Give me a tip.
– What?
How to make others' pay
without doing any work?
Wow.
– Excuse me.
What? Excuse me.
Customers came before beggars.
It's good that customers
came before beggars.
Excuse me.
I respect beggars a lot.
My neighbour dad is a beggar.
Because of that.
What is a neighbour dad?
He used to stay with us.
He was my dad.
He started living nearby
after a fight with my mom.
He comes often to say sorry.
I was born after that sorry.
Listen.
– What?
Stop this nonsense. I'm going.
Wow. How beautifully
you are going.
Why don't you become a model?
Just shut up.
I need a few things.
Don't dare to touch anything.
I worked hard to set all this.
Don't you dare
to touch anything.
Bring your own things.
I'm giving you money.
Don't show off your money.
God gave you hands.
Can't you beg and eat?
What does she think of herself?
Let me tell you one thing.
– What?
God gave me two legs.
I can leave using them.
God gave you money but you
get cheque from Sony Chanel.
I wanted to ask
if you have big black cardamom.
Hearing about cheque, she
is asking about big things.
Cardamom. Here it is.
But this is small cardamom.
You take care of it.
She will grow.
You can't get it without labour.
Start appreciating her
that she is very good.
Then she will become big.
If she doesn't listen to you
when she grows up
then grind her
and mix it with tea.
This is how you do it.
I want cardamom
for biriyani not tea.
What a shame.
I took you for a vegan
but you are a non-vegetarian.
Why does it matter to you?
I had so many dreams.
I planned to go to Marine Drive
with you.
You had non veg.
I lost my 80 rupees
auto fare too.
I lost my fare
and I got nothing.
Get lost.
To go to Marine Drive
you have to spend
160 rupees not 80 rupees.
Won't you share the fare?
You are the one
who had the non veg
and you expect me
to pay the fare.
What rubbish is this?
You better do your work
and pack one kg
of yellow lentil for me.
What's the colour
of yellow lentil?
Yellow, of course.
Wow. Then you will say
that blue lentil is blue
and black lentil is black.
Of course, blue is blue.
Is there any blue lentil?
I..
– Look at her.
She has no sense.
Do you have any idea
what do you want?
I have an idea.
Because of your red lower
vehicles are stopping outside.
I want yellow lentil not blue.
Tell me the colour
of yellow lentil.
I'll understand if she tells me.
You know what.
To hell with the lentil.
I don't want it.
You cook lentil in a cooker
not in hell.
To hell with cooker.
Cooker should be on the gas.
To hell with the gas.
– Cylinder?
To hell.
Don't send it to hell.
It will blast.
Do you have grams?
I have a mare.
What's the connection
of a mare with the grams?
Of course, there is.
A mare eats grams.
You won't believe
in my cousin's wedding,
the mare had a lot of grams
then she had the problem of gas.
His brother-in-law
was standing behind her.
The brother-in-law reached
at the venue before the groom.
Are you done?
– Yes.
You talk too much
but you can't run
your shop properly.
Hello. That lady is my witness
you may not have gone
for shopping in as many shops
as I started and left
after running them.
Talking of leaving,
you won't leave me, will you?
Of course, I'll leave you.
I'm a customer.
Can't a customer
and a shopkeeper be..
Can't there be love.
Why, Anjali?
I'm not Anjali.
I can tell her Anjali too
but that won't happen.
And I should
even consider her that
I won't let that happen.
Play the part of Anjali for
a few minutes.
What's the big deal?
– Fine.
Even if I play Anjali for once
you don't look Raj
from any angle.
I don't want to be Raj.
I want to be Simaran.
So, Shahrukh Khan should say
looking at me
Anjali.. I got goosebumps.
Give me the waxing cream.
Yuck.
I'm not here
to help you waxing.
I want 'Tejpatta',
Indian bay leaf.
The girls give so much trouble.
Here.
This isn't a bay leaf.
You asked for 'Tejpatta',
'tej' means fast. It's too fast.
Yesterday, he saw
small cardamom boiling.
then he went to the garlic
and told him something.
The garlic took off his clothes
and jumped into the oil.
look at my goosebumps.
Look here. Give me waxing cream.
I won't help you waxing.
Call the owner of the shop.
I'm the owner.
You are the owner?
– Yes.
You are the owner and you
don't know how to run a shop.
Does a shop know
how to run its owner?
If you are so proud
of your red lower
then try to run this shop.
Why should I run the shop?
Will you fly a plane?
Are you a pilot?
You travel in an auto-rickshaw
but you are talking big.
Fine. If you challenge my pride
then I'll show you
how to run this shop.
Get up from there.
– Okay. Great. Come on.
I left my shop for so long..
– yes.
I'm worried.
– All things must've been sold.
Hey.
There is a customer
in the shop.
Please come in.
How may I help you?
I want one kg of lentil
and two kg rice.
Why are you buying from here?
This is our shop.
Why will you buy from here?
Wow, you came back early.
Did you come rolling down.
Where were you?
my grand mother's
sister-in law's uncle's
grandson's younger sister's
son's brother's nephew's
grandmother' grandson's
younger brother's
tonsure ceremony is there.
It's not needed. Just say we
went for the tonsure ceremony.
I should say only tonsure?
– Yes.
Then I shouldn't say
my grand mother's
sister-in law's uncle's
grandson's younger sister's
son's brother's nephew's
grandmother' grandson's
No. Please no.
.. tonsure ceremony.
She completed it.
What's this?
Anyway
Tell the owner of this shop
about what did you sell.
One minute. He is the owner.
No.
You told me
that you are the owner.
I never said
that he is the owner.
He is calling himself the owner.
You called yourself owner too.
You didn't get a degree
that you were the owner.
He is right.
I believe he is the owner.
If he is the owner
then who I am.
You are a lazy,
good for nothing, fat guy.
From where do you learn
all these things?
There.
my grand mother's
sister-in law's uncle's
grandson's younger sister's
son's brother's nephew's
grandmother' grandson's
younger brother's
tonsure ceremony is there.
Someone told this to me.
Tell me who told you this.
I'll make him bald.
My grandmother's sister..
– Enough. Stop it.
You keep repeating
the same thing.
He can't handle his wife.
How will he handle the shop?
That's why I hired you
to run the shop.
Why didn't you do it?
He gave this shop to me.
What?
– Yes.
Don't dare to think
about my shop.
Listen. Why don't you
get married?
Both of you can share it.
Why would I marry him?
Because I won't marry you.
When did I say
that I'll marry you?
Hello. Don't even
think about me.
I'm married.
Are you crazy?
You got it. Right.
I spent my whole life with her.
The one who keeps telling.
'my grandmother's sister..'
I am least interested
to know about your life story.
Okay, I'll tell a joke.
I have a stock of jokes.
Your stock opens up
as soon as you see a girl.
Come on in,
I'll beat you to a pulp today.
No..
– How can you talk like that?
I was just.. – Have
you ever told a joke to me?
The situation
is out of hands now.
These fatsos will have
a huge fight. Come with me.
We'll go.
Hey, get out of here.
You don't tell me any
joke, but you're after her.
Your stock opens up
as soon as you see a girl.
I will..
– Listen to me.
Wow!
Ms. Archana, do you
believe music is powerful?
Yes, a person faints
if you throw the tabla at him.
Fights everywhere..
Talks of violence.
I mean the power
in the singing.
Okay.
– You understand power, right?
It is what you have
applied on Sony TV.
Okay.
Two amazing singers
will be joining us today.
So let's start
and call a singer
who is ruling our hearts
since 2 decades with her voice.
Amidst all your applause
please welcome
the very talented
playback singer
the one and
only Richa Sharma.
Wow!
– Wow!
Wow!
– Thank you so much.
Ma'am, you're very beautiful
as it is and while singing
the dimple that forms..
I was worried our
microphone would get stuck..
Ma'am,
what was this that you sung?
It is after these songs
that a gathering gets over.
No,
this is how ours start.
What she said is right.
I start from
where people end.
A huge round of applause
for Ms. Richa Sharma.
Thank you so much..
I swear I even
saw these cut outs moving.
They were
filled with energy.
Welcome to our show.
– Thank you, Kapil.
A huge round of applause
for Ms. Richa Sharma.
Ms. Archana, only you weren't
working during the lockdown.
Is it? – Ms. Richa
composed so many songs.
Wow!
– And she even started a show
'Sureeli Chai
With Richa.'
Is it?
– Yes.
She interviewed
many musicians and singers.
The biggest thing is she
also interviewed Kapil Sharma.
Okay.
You called me
after four years.
You're here
after four years? – Yes.
What about the time you spent
as judge in other channels?
Ma'am, whenever a heroine
comes to our show. – Yes.
I ask them what they eat
as they are fit and glowing.
But to you I want
to ask that your voice..
We always say
Ms. Archana's voice is loud.
But she appeared
a lioness while singing. – Yes.
What power..
– She sings with the mic here..
The audience
move back in fear.
Ma'am, what do you eat?
'Tan Pura'.
It is possible.
It's not a big thing.
We were just joking
but she actually ate for real.
And then a string
was sticking out
and we pulled the
instrument out with the string.
Ma'am, you look
wonderful while singing.
Wow.
– Thank you so much.
This is the smoke machine
we got for 2200 rupees.
Now we get the feeling
that we're wealthy.
Wealthy.. Wherever
you are, wealth follows.
Wow Kapil!
Ma'am, I wanted to ask you
a question from Ms. Archana
She said just like how
you sing even at a high note
do you get
better money when you do so?
There's no money
for singing in high note.
Okay.
– When the foundation is strong
only then will the
building reach heights.
Wow!
– Wow.
Very good.
So many youngsters
have this misconception that
'The higher we sing,
higher the shows we'll get.'
"Higher
will be our earnings."
So first lay a good
foundation, practice well.
And you will start
becoming the building. – Yes.
Very good.
Just like Ms. Archana
practiced first.
She would see where
Mr. Sidhu's vanity was first.
And then in whose
vanity he would sit then.
I wish I could do that.
He hasn't
changed one bit.
I thought I am
going after four years
so he would have
become a gentleman.
He is still
a goon like he was.
He's become
a bigger goon.
Big goon. – Do you
know what Ms. Archana tells me?
She says I sing
both high and low note.
I asked how and
according to her high note
Is taking money from
Mr. Parmeet's shirt pocket.
And lower note
means from the pant pocket.
Those are not
high and low notes.
Okay, thank you.
This is amazing.
I thought
after getting married
and becoming a dad
to a beautiful girl child
whom I even visited.
She's very cute.
– Yes.
So,
I thought he'd be matured.
He's still the same.
Nothing has changed.
Nothing has changed.
Had I changed,
you wouldn't even come to me.
Oh, no.
You've changed. Forget it.
Ms. Archana, do you know
Ms. Richa not only sings
in high note but also laughs
And a judge in
many reality shows too.
Ms. Archana, be careful.
Your place in
the show is in danger.
Yes. – I'll
practice laughing even more.
I can think of it
for the sisterhood we share.
Oh, my dear.
She will do this here.
She will
straight up attack you outside.
No one can
even look at the show.
Even when I go there
to relax during rehearsals
she doesn't
let me. – Absolutely no.
She says the couch
belongs to her.
Yesterday she said
stitch my dress with it.
So that the couch
goes everywhere I go.
Oh my god.
I wonder where
he gets these ideas from.
Forget me,
tell what do you eat.
Yes.
– What do you eat for breakfast?
Well I just breads
made out of Quinoa.
Oh really, darling?
I was told..
– Spell Quinoa first.
Quinoa?
– Yes.
Nothing to spell, It's
white in colour to be eaten.
We were performing
in Belgium and I went to eat
at an
Indian restaurant. – Yes.
I ate
cottage cheese over there.
Ms. Archana, the cottage
cheese was such that if held
you can pull the other
side continuously.
No matter what,
it won't break.
I thought even if a
person somehow eats this
What about later?
I mean..
So, we'll talk
a lot with Ms. Richa.
Before that we'll
call upon our second guest.
With a huge
round of applause
I would like to invite,
please welcome
Famous and talented
Bollywood playback singer
Queen of Sufi's.
The one and only
Harshdeep Kaur.
Welcome, Harshdeep!
Today, on our show
we have two great singers!
– We want to prove that
two females singers
are not always enemies.
They can be like sisters too.
Yes, they can be sisters.
– Sisters!
Please come, 'sisters',
welcome to the show.
Ms. Archana, do you know
something about Harshdeep?
She started singing
when she was 14.
She was an expert.
So, was this your love for music
or your hatred for studies?
So, you didn't like to study?
You thought if you will sing
your dad won't send you
to school.
Was this the case? – When I
would study for my exams
I would do it in tune.
– Oh, how?
To memorise it soon.
And I was excellent in studies.
For instance..
"Three minus two is one."
"One plus five is six!"
I would memorise it like this.
So, I remembered the tune.
As a kid, I also used to
memorise the tables like this.
"One multiplied by two is two.
Two multiplied by two is four."
I would forget the rest.
I'd only remember the tune.
All the kids are like this.
Ms. Archana, have you
done something like this?
No. – Oh! You went to
an expensive school.
Nonsense! – You didn't even know
about the weird punishments.
They didn't punish us like that.
They would ask us to kneel down.
I was in convent school.
They didn't punish us like that.
But.. – They must punish
the boys like that.
There were no boys
in my school! – Is it? – Yes.
All girls school. – Then how
did you get admission there?
Why don't you scold him?
Control him!
– Well..
I'm earning well here.
Why should I scold him?
You know, Ms. Archana, Harshdeep
started singing when she was 14.
But she started singing at
8 years of age. – Really?
So, you also did not focus
on passing the exams.
I mean, you wanted
a career in music.
The test that we passed..
Others struggle
even to enter that field.
Wow!
– Right! Well said!
I know nothing apart from music.
I have dedicated
my entire life to it until now.
In the future too, I'll
do the same. – Nice!
Right!
Ms. Richa, you are a devotional
and spiritual person.
Were you a mischievous kid?
– No, I was a devotional kid.
She is mischievous now.
– I'm spiritual now.
More naughty.
– She is right.
She is younger to me
but she is my boss.
She seems delicate..
– Decent.
Decent. No.. – She seems
like a kid who had fruit.
What? – It seems,
she just had an avocado.
And if such innocents kids
break someone's things
they don't even scold them.
'No worries, dear, it was old.'
– 'We'll get another.'
But in school.. Since we
are talking about school..
It was the only way
to save ourselves.
If we are lacking by one marks
in any test
I would tell the teacher that
I'd sing for her for one marks.
Really?
– So, I'd do such shenanigans.
I also did something
like that once.
I decided to sing
to save myself from beatings.
When I sang,
he thrashed me more.
This is wrong. Because I
personally like your song..
Last time, too, I said that..
I'll repeat it.
And I'll say this in future too.
Why aren't you singing?
No one wants
to record my songs.
I'll make you sing.
– Go ahead.
But I asked you to sing
last year. – She had asked you
to sing that song.
– Yes, Harsh did!
Harsh, have some fruits.
I will give you.. – Thank you.
– Take whatever you want.
The thing I liked most about
him is when I had called him
to say that he has to
sing for this event
he didn't ask anything. He was
ready to come anywhere.
So, I was impressed
by his bravery.
And when it was released,
I was nervous.
Because when there are many
singers, you worry thinking
that what if they feel that
their part is less or later..
Then he called me up. He said
that he didn't get as many calls
even after his wedding
as he is getting
after people are listening
to his song. – Wow!
I was very happy,.
I didn't even talk to anyone
in my neighbourhood
for a few days.
I said,
'don't talk to a singer'!
'Like that, okay..'
Have you noticed
something about Harshdeep?
After her wedding,
she is getting more awards.
She is releasing more songs.
She is doing more shows.
So, is your husband lucky
for you or have you given him
all your tension and
focussing on your work?
I gave all my tension to him.
I don't worry at all.
I just sing my songs.
Ms. Archana, we often hear
these stories from celebrities
about how they proposed to
their partners at
5-star restaurants
or on snow-clad mountains.
We've heard about Harshdeep
that Mankeet proposed to her
in the Gurudwara.
Is it true, Harshdeep? – Really?
Yes, absolutely. – We'd like to
hear the story, please. Tell us.
We've known each other
since we were kids.
We were in the same class
for 10 years, but..
You were in the same class
for 10 years? – I mean, first..
In the same school?
I'm sorry.
We were in the same school.
We were always in the same
class throughout. – Okay.
Then we moved to Mumbai.
I was studying in college.
And where was Mankeet living?
– In Delhi. – Okay.
He came to Mumbai
to study in a college. – Okay.
He remembered I was
in Mumbai too. So, we met.
We reconnected
and became friends.
We would go out
to watch movies and eat.
And I realised that he is
a nice guy.
He's a gentleman. – Yes.
– Decent and nice.
And he also gave me hints
that he liked me. – Okay.
We'd often visit the Gurudwara
at 4 Bungalows.
We'd sit quietly and pray
for some time.
So, over there,
he slowly whispered..
'I would like to marry you.'
And I felt like.. In the movie
'Rabb Ne Bana Di Jodi'
when Shahrukh Khan comes
from the Golden Temple, as Suri
and Anushka Sharma just looks.
And there's a song playing
in the background.
That song started playing
in my head
and I realised he was the one.
And since it was happening
in God's presence, it was right.
Absolutely. – What a story!
– And I said yes.
Ms. Archana, yours is
a sweet story too.
Silly. – You'd go to the temple
and Mr. Parmeet would come.
She didn't look at him
for six months.
But then he was assigned the
duty of distributing food.
That's when she noticed
who the boy was, who..
He's too much.
He only gave 'Dal' to the rest,
but for her
he took out an onion
from his pocket.
Then they got married.
– For the onion, right?
I'm sorry, Ms. Archana.
– Kapil, there's another reason
behind my decision
to marry Mankeet.
He has a great sense of humour.
– Really?
Look at it this way. Girls love
boys with a sense of humour.
Absolutely. Kapil..
– Ginni is a lucky girl.
That's a rumour. – Really?
– Girls want a sense of humour.
It's nothing like that.
– Don't you make her laugh?
I don't talk to her much.
She doesn't let him talk.
Sir, you get a fruit.
Thank you.
– This is the best.
We are exchanging fruits.
Whoa!
Ms. Richa, it
is such a blessing.
When you come
home we talk all this.
We are discussing it here
and getting paid too.
Getting paid!
Play nicely.
What's this?
– What is this?
Hey..
– This is..
Greetings.
What a
musical environment!
Greetings..
– Greetings.- I won't do that.
Greetings..
Your 'dhoti'
was about to fall down.
The way you sang..
But it is
great to see you all.
Can I tell you
something strange? – What?
We have 'Sharma' here
and here too.
It
is a 'Sharma Sharma' show now.
Now, Anushka Sharma
will come in some time.
Then Rajat Sharma
will come.
Then,
Ishan Sharma will come.
Then, I'll ask two Sharma
are in front, two at the back
how many
Sharma are there?
Look at that.
We all
Sharmas have settled here.
Because of that
reason all people are laughing.
Look, how I made
lyri-kis while talking.
Lyri-kis.
Ms. Richa, I've started
writing quite amazing lyri-kis.
If you ever need
lyri-kis for your song, call me.
Call before 10pm, else
my wife get suspicious.
You can call after 11pm
too, she sleeps by that time.
Then,
we can freely talk on any topic.
Hey..
– Yes?
Get some snacks
for them, what nonsense is it?
Why to offer
snacks? I offer myself.
Yes.
– Ms. Richa, adopt me.
Hey.
– I'll tell you a joke.
You can sing me
a lullaby.
'Lullaby..
Milk costs Rs. 80.'
It says
'A bowl of milk..'
Rs. 80!
– A bowl is of steel.
Don't you buy milk,
you have no knowledge.
Archana, to
tell you the truth, milk comes
to his house but flees
as he starts taking interview.
Hello and welcome, all.
Today we have with us,
the very creamy and white
and the very pure, milk.
So, milk, how
are you so fair?
Where does the
cream go that's in you?
Good one.
– When you get curdled
why does it become
cottage cheese, not curd?
How did you
like it on our show?
Kapil Sharma,
you do all this, right?
I talked so breathlessly
like Shankar
Mahadevan, right?- Of course.
Tell him to
send Loy to thank me.
Just tell
him to keep talking.
No, make me make
a building.
I mix concrete
and cement in mouth.
Forget all this
and relax.
You need to
speak a lot tomorrow.
Where?
– In the repeat telecast of it.
He needs to
speak in the repeat telecast!
Ms. Richa.
– Yes?
I sang good,
didn't I? – Yes.
I have a good
knowledge of beats.
What do you know?
– Everything.
Whatever you
say I ignore it.
Whatever it is, I
like Bacha Yadav's comedy.
His comedy is good but
today he is irritating.
Go and let
me work. – No, I won't.
I declined this too.
Keeping the jokes
apart, can I tell you the truth?
Yes.
– In singing
no one can hold
my hand.- Do you sing so well?
No.. I am married
and if my wife sees it
she doubts me.
But when she
goes to her paternal house
Ms. Richa, you can
have some affectionate words.
You need not feel shy.
I'll talk to you
on one condition. – What is it?
That you supply milk,
cottage cheese and curd to me
from your dairy
for the
entire year, for free. – Done..
Okay.
– I will send buffaloes there.
He does
not send buffaloes
he covers himself up
and stands there on four kegs.
Are you
here for this nonsense?
No, I will talk
to the point.
Reason why
I come.- Yes.
I have opened a
music school.
Oh!
– So, I need charity.- Charity!
If you could help me..
Don't give him
anything.
He eats it all.
– I eat money?
Then, I should go
to a bank, instead of bathroom.
With a little effort
I may save some bankrupt banks.
He said that I
eat money.
Oh God!
Who will be the teacher
in your music school?
Archana,
she is good at beats.
When did she do
that?- She beats plates and all.
If she wants
she beats Parmeet too.
He is very
sweet. He accepts it.
What are you talking?
What will she think?
Whatever you may
think, it is of no use
as I am married.
I'm also
married. – She too is.
Really?
Then, we should forget about it.
I am your big fan.
Really? – I have heard
all your songs.
Tell me something.
Will you sing in 'Agra Petha?
How can anyone do that?
She sang in 'Bareilly Ki Barfi'
then why not in 'Agra Petha'?
There's a point.
Amazing.
Am I right?
Nice title. – 'Petha' from Agra
and your voice both are sweet.
Sweet..
– Don't mind what he says.
He doesn't know
anything about music.
He comes here for no reason.
I belong to a family
of musicians, bro.
Which one? – Bro?
– Bhaturas.
Bhaturas.. – What do you mean?
Bhaturas. Which one is this?
– Bhaturas?
In this, you need to come
home to eat 'Bhaturas'.
Because you can't eat it
outside. They're very oily.
Okay, I also have some jokes.
So let me tell you one.
We have Sunday and Monday.
So Sunday is stronger.
I see. – Monday is weak.
Tell me why.
Why? – Because it is a weekday.
– Because Monday is a weekday.
It's a weekday!
She is better than you
in cracking such jokes. – Right.
Please tell us one.
For us. – Please. Tell us one.
You've put me into a tight spot.
Try to recall.
You might remember.
Tell me.
Why is seven stronger than nine?
– Why? – Why?
Because seven, eight, nine.
– Nine.
Seven, eight, nine, sir.
You are still thinking.
– I still didn't get it.
'Seven ate nine'!
All right,
it was nice meeting you.
I'll leave now.
My buffalos are waiting for me.
I've to take care of them.
I've a family. All right!
Thank you..
– Thank you very much.
See you.
All right, Ms. Archana!
Thank you.
– Wow!
Kapil.
– What?
I'm relieved that Vishal
and Rekha Bharadwaj didn't come.
Why? – Because I didn't
prepare anything to say to them.
My God..
I wasn't expecting them.
What a co..
– What?
What a coin..
You mean 'coincidence'.
That's what I meant.
I can't pronounce it.
Coincidence..
– Coincidence.
I'm truly a huge fan
of your songs. – I know.
As you know, we're in lockdown
for 5 to 6 months now. – Yes.
She sang a song for
the lockdown way before that.
Which one?
– 'The world seems lonely'.
I'm truly a huge fan
of yours.
You're a singer too, right?
– I sign..
Ms. Harshdeep.
– Yes, I am.
We had Saleem Suleman on
the show, he's also a singer.
Yes. – We also had Mika,
he's also a singer.
So? – Well, all of you made it
as singers, so why didn't he?
I mean, just think..
Kapil, if you had made it as,
a singer, you'd also be on T.V.
I'm already on T.V.
This is your show. I dare you to
appear on someone else's show.
Bravo!
I can guarantee
that their TRP will tank.
The things she say.
– I know I say a lot of things
but he's just like a brother.
– Right.
There's no one like him.
– Yes.
He sings, he does comedy, he
earns and let other's earn too.
True. – Give him
a huge round of applauds.
Am I right?
It's true.
You know, my brother,
Krishna
just bought a flat for
Rs. 10 crore in Lokhandwala.
Really?
– Yes.
With a Rs. 9.5 crore loan.
All thanks to him.
Oh dear..
I wanted to ask you both..
You sing such amazing songs
in movies and all..
Who does the chores
at your house?
It's not like they sing all day.
Yes, they do. They sing whenever
I play a song.
Look.. – Yes! I play
all day and they sing!
You must be playing a CD.
Is that so?
– Yes, They record the song.
Aren't records made in cricket.
Sachin Tendulkar made a record.
Am I right?
Sapna, when you nothing about
music, then why do you talk?
N-No.. I know about music.
I know everything. – Okay.
There's that.. Harmonium!
Yes. – It costs Rs. 15,000.
Yes.
And then there's the tabla.
That costs Rs. 7,500.
– Okay.
Okay. – Yes! And my favourite
is the flute.
I see.
– Why? Does it come cheap?
No. But if you pour water in it
it comes out from six places
like a fountain. I love it!
That's how we play at our chawl.
Have you ever played any
instrument? Don't talk nonsense.
Don't yell at me.
I know everything.
I've played that..
I've played the 'Tabla'.
The I can also play that..
It's like..
You have to blow into it.
Saxophone? – Saxophone?
– No, not that. – Trumpet?
No, it's long but short.
– 'Shehnai'? – 'Shehnai'?
It's long but..
– Short.
The flute man has it.
– Snake charmer's flute?
A small flute? – A clarinet?
– No! A balloon.
Look here. This is the
best instrument.
Here, let me show you.
– Superb..
Now watch.
Oh, God! – Slow clap.
– Isn't it amazing!
This is what you call
a real instrument!
Anybody could play a guitar
except Dinesh.
I've heard that you mostly sing
devotional songs. – Yes.
And I've also read
in the newspaper
that you have six siblings.
– Yes.
Okay, only you like
devotional songs.
Your parents seem to like
romantic songs.
There was lovely song you sang..
'I want to visit my beloved..'
– Yes.
So, can't we go directly? Is it
compulsory to sing?
It's good. At least that way
people need me.
How else will I earn a
living? You earn yours here.
Even I sing that song
when I visit my boyfriend.
The song remains the same,
the boyfriend keeps changing.
Let's have a huge round of
applause for Ms. Harshdeep!
Why?
– She has a lovely voice.
Do you know how
she became a singer?
How?
– By singing.
Obviously, if she didn't sing,
she wouldn't become a singer.
What's so funny? It's simple.
Absolutely simple.
Why should we complicate things?
– Right.
There's a proverb,
Ms. Archana. – What's that?
Life is so simple. Why must we
complicate it. – Right.
Then why did you complicate
Mr. Sidhu's life?
Oh, my God!
Ma'am, I've read about you
that you've been
singing since you were
six years old.
Five.
– Since five years of age?
So what took you so long
to decide?
Sapna, you're so adorable.
– Thank you.
I have a nephew
who is little and he's
a big fan of yours.
At his home, he has set up
his personal
Sapna Beauty Parlour.
He says that he can't call me
Sapna
because there's only one Sapna
who comes on
The Kapil Sharma Show.
He calls me Susheela instead.
He's.. – See, you have
such a fan following.
You should say nice things.
– Yes.
Now that you've praised me
so much
can you do me a favour?
Please tell me. – You still
haven't done a massage.
Yes, that's my main job.
We have different types of job.
Since you're from Punjab, we
have a 'Patiala' massage.
Okay. – In this, we apply oil
on the client
Okay.
– Then we beat him up.
What! – We beat him
black and blue.
Then I call my assistant
as ask her for that.
What do I ask for?
'Patti', means bandages.
We do the massage
with 'Patti', hence Patiala.
I have a massage for you.
You sang a song, 'Tauba Tauba'.
Okay! – You sang..
– Yes – That's the massage.
Okay. – 'Tauba tauba' massage?
– What's that?
I can't tell you that..
It's a bit different!
– She can't tell you.
Yes. We have another special
massage for you.
'Mausiki' massage.
– Your aunt gives the massage?
Your maternal aunt?
– No, my paternal aunt comes.
Then why is it
'Mausi-ki' massage?
'Mausi' means maternal aunt. How
come your paternal aunt does it?
Because my paternal aunt
is Mukesh's maternal aunt.
It's.. It's all in the family.
It's time for me to go.
– Please don't.
But I have to.
You know the singer,
Mr. Kailash?
The last time he came,
he left his Kher here.
Anyway, I'm leaving..
– Yes.
Really. Actually, I gave him
a very good oil massage.
Then? – So wanted to give me
a tip.
Rs. 5000. I said, 'Leave it,
Kher.' And he left his Kher.
Anyway, it was lovely
to have you all here.
Please come again. – Sure!
Thank you. – Love you, Sapna!
The Kapil Sharma Show 2019
(Part 7 of 7) Ep 142
Story: ZWP22720
Lang: GBR
Give a loud round of applause
for Ms. Richa
and Ms. Harshdeep.
Please come.
Ms. Richa and Ms. Harshdeep,
thank you so much for coming.
Thank you, sir..
– It was fun like always.

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